Could this question change your life for ever?
Welcome to the January 2013 Carnival of Natural Parenting:
Recovering from the Holidays
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama. This month our participants have written about how their families get back to normal after the holidays are over.
I love the potential of the New Year and rather than feeling burned out from the festive season I feel a renewed sense of inner peace.
I’m not one for traditional resolutions but I like to use this time of year to take stock of my life. ALL areas of my life!
It’s easy to focus on the things that are working particularly well or the ones that bring us pain but I feel at my most joyful when I have balance.
This means a balance between work and play and an inner sense of balance for mind, body and spirit.
I’m an empath and highly sensitive so the world can be a noisy, frenetic place to me. Sometimes I put my hands over my ears and have to close my eyes just to find the peace in our crazy, fast-paced society.
At times when I’m feeling really sensitive I can feel the electricity buzzing through the walls at home, the ticking of the clock becomes unbearable and electric lighting violates my senses.
Finding balance then, is an act of knowing yourself. It’s the honouring of self and taking a moment to check in and notice. It’s about becoming an observer of ourselves and demanding the very best for self. It’s about noticing, with compassion when you’re about to burn out and parenting yourself wisely.
This is easier said than done when we’re wearing the mother-lover-daughter-friend-colleague masks. How do we find the Self in amongst all the labels and expectations of others? This one has taken me over 20 years to figure out, but I’m finally getting there.
Loving ourselves takes commitment and discipline, unless we chose perfect parents who taught us it was ok to put ourselves first. Chances are we were given messages from our childhood such as “it’s not ok to feel and express anger”, “It’s not ok to get your needs met”, “Nice people think of others before themselves”…
And it can take a whole lifetime of learning through pain before we break through to being able to learn through joy.
I invite you to check in with yourself right now… It will only take a moment.
- Close your eyes, focus on your body – are you breathing rapidly, high up in your chest? Are your neck and shoulders tight? Are you thirsty? Do you need to pee? Just observe yourself without judgement.
- Now take three, deep, nourishing breaths, right down into your abdomen. This act alone can be one of the most loving experiences you have today. By breathing in this way you change the chemistry of your body-mind and wonderful, healing starts to happen!
- Finally; ask yourself this poignant question:
“What is the most gentle and loving thing I can do for myself right now?”
Tell me your answer in the comments below, then honour yourself by acknowledging and acting on that need…
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